Eyes Up

Hiking in the Pyrenees with Don last May, the terrain on one side sloped away steeply to the stream at the bottom. We realised it was beautiful there, but we couldn't look as we had to keep alert to the path to avoid an accident.
Alert to the path to avoid an accident. It is hard to keep a focus on the promises of a bright future in God while navigating some of the challenging points of the path through life. Just at a time when keeping focus on Jesus is critical, we feel insecure about taking steps forward unless we are really focused in on the path. It's a dilemma, and a challenge.
Choices to make for my Mom, on a path she would never have chosen, one she often said she didn't want to be on in the future. Memory loss is heartbreaking. It erases confidence and personality as the sufferer struggles to grip on to who she is.
We are more than our memory. When her spirit is released from the grip of a deteriorating body and mind, she will be restored to who she was and much more.
Meanwhile, I need to take these next steps with focus on the horizon, trusting the Lord will keep my feet on the path. The darkest hour is just before dawn. And that Dawn is going to be breathtaking.

Be still

Be still, for the presence of the Lord, the holy one is here.
Living in community opens you to germs and bugs you might not meet if you lived in isolation. Close proximity and a buffet line are perfect for the proliferation of tummy bugs.
No fun.
Living in community, though, also opens you to contagious faith. As one person can share her love for the Lord, he can take it further.
Living in our world today, with the upheavals and demigods and wars and famines, opens us up to fear and despair.
Living in our world today, though, also opens us up to share our hope for the future based in Jesus' promises.
As I move towards recovery from the bugs which moved into me yesterday, may I express hope and be light in this bit of world today.
May you be, too.

New horizons

Horizons. Expanding. Contracting. Exciting.
I was going to write a negative emotion to describe contracting horizons, but no. Expanding horizons can be unsettling and confusing, offering endless possibilities and choice. Contracting, on the other hand, bring focus. Or should I say, can bring focus.
Busy lives distract from the important. Lives winding down have few distractions and can in fact be the richest time of life.
Theoretical thoughts as I rub shoulders with many nonagenarians who share a residential facility with Mom. I know many continue to pursue distractions, be it television or whatever. Declining cognitive ability can impair focus too, and just create fog.
So important to squirrel away spiritual riches now, so that in the winter of life there is much to nourish the soul, whether or not the mind or body is able.

Silence

Silence in the near space. Sounds of traffic beyond the windows of this flat. Touches with my past surround me, bringing a smile, bringing an ache. Reunion with loved ones, so precious, so deep the love.
This is the day the Lord has made. He blesses moment by moment. He is in the silence. He is in the rush. He is in the past. He is in the future. But in peace I grasp his hand for he is in the now.
This is the day he has given me. I am full of joy and gratitude.

The Light shines in the darkness

The world sinks into sepia as November marches on. It is tempting to sink with it. But the crab apple tree boasts a myriad of vibrant red fruits, sharply contrasting with the dying colours all around. The last roses of summer still bloom. All is not sepia.

Up before dawn this morning (sounds more impressive than it is, given the short days), I noticed the bright morning star twinkling strong and steady.

The cliché is that it is always darkest just before dawn. Certainly, the morning star shone brightly out of the greying sky, reminding me of Jesus. The light has come into the world, and the darkness has neither overcome nor understood it. It’s time to protect our inner flames from the diet of poison in today’s atmosphere – be it the political, the environmental, or the social arenas.

It’s time to shine.

When the darkness closes in, when the conversation resonates fear and uncertainty, I’m going to remember that morning star, take a deep breath of the Spirit, and share hope. Jesus invites us to walk in the light, trusting that he has it covered; he knows the end from the beginning; he is good; he is love, and he is faithful.

This is a fitting month for thanksgiving.

Hard as Granite

Today I parked in a lot I don’t usually use in Aberdeen. It meant that I had the pleasure of walking past the beautiful Marischal college, reputedly the second-largest granite building in the world. It has had a face-wash in the last few years, and the apron in front has been paved and turned into a mostly-pedestrian only zone.

As I returned to my car, I paused to enjoy the beauty of this 19^th century building. Yes, grey granite, but glinting in the light, its intricate towers gleaming and beautiful.

I thank God for craftsmen and women who can transform hard stone into a thing of beauty.

I thank God for Jesus, who transforms hard hearts into soft, compassionate ones. Praying he works to soften hearts as Americans go to the polls tomorrow.

Slightly Wonky

I spent a happy Friday afternoon building a red car out of cake for grandson Gregor’s second birthday party. Following a guide on YouTube, I was attempting to copy what the instructor demonstrated.

The cake didn’t rise as well as hers did. Oh well, I thought, it can be a low-riding sports car. She recommended piping the frosting on, but then, she sounded like she was in sizzling Australia where the butter cream icing remains soft and pliable, not in a cold farmhouse in northeastern Scotland where it goes brick hard. I spread it and smoothed it with a knife dunked in boiling water. I discovered later that I should have rested the piping bags on the radiator – but then, it hadn’t been on yet when I was decorating the cake.

End result? A slightly wonky car with a flat tire. Did Greg notice? No, I think I got away with it…

Whatever you do, do it in love, Scripture advises. I may not utter the perfect prayer when in a group or meeting; I may not remember the name of the new girl coming in the church door but I can still smile a warm welcome; I am not perfect. Despite our apprehensions, it’s the love that others see, not the perfect offering. It’s the love that God sees.

My life might look a mess, slightly crooked and with a flat tire. But God sees my heart. I don’t have to be perfect before I come to him.