Keep Schtum!

In one of the early Narnia books by C S Lewis, the witch invades London and commandeers a taxi – pulled in those days by a horse. I have a picture of her in my mind’s eye as I write – she is standing with feet planted firmly on the footrest where the driver had been sitting. She’s pushed him off and now stands, legs akimbo, hair wildly blowing, one hand holding the reins, the other lifting a whip high, ready to be brought crashing across the poor horse’s back. She is jolting from side to side through the wet cobbled streets of London.

I like to think I let God do the driving in my life. I know that is the best way. That is what I want to do. But.

I have a situation in my life. I am upset about it, and long to wade in and fix it...though I am aware that my ‘fix’ might just make things worse. God’s been highlighting a truth to me for some time now: the Bible says that Jesus’ mother Mary ‘pondered things in her heart’, and I read the other day how Jacob, when hearing Joseph’s dream, ‘pondered it in his heart’. It seems it is a good policy to keep ‘schtum’ sometimes. Maybe always. Ponder and pray. Trust and obey.

Initially I felt relief that I didn’t have to sort this situation. God would. I praised and thanked him. I felt great. Until 3 am, when I awoke and began to stew. So one night I got up and drafted out an email, convinced that perhaps, in fact, I ought to just say a couple of things. I didn’t press Send,  though, realising that I needed to ask advice and consider it in the cold light of day. 

Which I did, and then, still convinced that the time of pondering was over and I should take action, I pressed Send. Twice. My laptop did not respond. It had switched off Wifi. I found the button and switched it on again. Still no connection. By the time I had Troubleshot the problem and was back on line, I had recognised my folly. My disobedience.

Like the wild witch in the Narnia story, I had given up riding shotgun and had pushed Jesus over and grabbed the reins. I was about to run roughshod through the situation, so God in his mercy shut me down. 

I feel peace again. I am where I belong, riding shotgun, with Jesus holding the reins. Grateful that he sometimes intervenes in spectacular ways to help us obey him. Like the psalmist, I wait for him to sort the situation. He’s the God of miracles, after all.

No Insurance

I had an accident last week, when a chair’s legs gave way while I was standing on it. I crashed down onto a radiator, badly bruising my leg and my ribs – which may be cracked. I spent a bit of time online googling cracked ribs, and one comment which I read was both astonishing and sad, and yet highlighted something I knew to be true. 

A man who suspected he had cracked his ribs was asking for advice on how to treat them, and ended his plea by stating that he didn’t want to be told to go to the doctor, because he had no insurance and could not afford to seek medical help.

Living in the UK, I have grown accustomed to the freedom to seek help for physical ailments without first having to consider the possible cost. But I am also American. I remember when I was newly-graduated from university and working in my first job, and I had a nagging pain in my kidney area. I did go to a doctor, because I did have some medical insurance, but when he suggested I get a scan and it would cost $50 I had to decide. Did I think it was bad enough to be worried about, or should I just put up with it? I opted to put up with it. I didn’t have $50 and my insurance wouldn’t have covered it.

This man with the possible broken ribs is not alone in his lack of options when a health crisis occurs. If he can’t turn to doctors, and if Google didn’t give him any reassurance, to whom else could he turn?

It reminded me of an African from Nigeria or Ghana who came to speak at an evening service several years ago. We were focusing on divine healing that week, and discussing how rare it is for us to see God work miracles, though we all believed in them. This African said that where he lived, they saw God regularly work miracles because he was their only resource. There were no doctors. No human medical help. So the people turned to God and looked to him in faith, and he frequently healed them. They expected him to heal. They put their trust in him to heal.

That drew my thinking on to the healing which happens so regularly in Redding, CA, when members of Bethel church pray for others. Very often they are out on the streets, praying for homeless people. They also pray for people in their weekly Healing Rooms, and regularly see God work miracles. Is this sometimes because many for whom they pray have no insurance, and no other resource except God? 

When Jesus was approached by two blind men, he asked them if they believed he was able to heal them. ‘Yes, Lord,’ they replied. (Matthew 9:28-29). ‘According to your faith will it be done to you.’

Although I shy away from aligning healing with having faith (knowing how harmful and hurtful it is to think that perhaps God hasn’t healed because my faith isn’t good enough), it seems that there is sometimes a correlation between faith and healing. 

Maybe it’s easier to put faith in God, when there is no one else to turn to. 

I am grateful for the NHS in Britain. I have been a recipient of amazing health care given by caring nurses and world-class consultants. I believe it is right for a civilised society to look after the vulnerable and sick, irrespective of their ability to pay. 

But I do wonder whether this safety net has undermined some of the faith we might otherwise have put in the God who does heal?