On Fire

We usually have an open fire in the evenings to warm the living room. I’ve noticed that when the newspaper is scrunched up too tightly, it is slow to catch fire and burn. Odd, because we think of paper as highly combustible, yet if it’s too tightly packed, no air can penetrate and it is slow to burn.

We women and men are made to be set on fire for God by the fire of the Holy Spirit. We can be too overwrought, though, or too self-absorbed, so the breath of the Spirit cannot penetrate and the fire cannot catch. We can overthink, over-stress, get ourselves tied up in knots, when really, Jesus says it’s so easy. Just rest in him. Just open up and let his breath inspire us.

I’m so grateful for the modern technology which brings us contemporary and old-fashioned worship songs on YouTube, which brings us sermons and talks on podcasts. We have so much access to fuel which should feed the fire within us, if only we weren’t so anxious.

Trust in me, Jesus says. I’ve been de-cluttering, and in the course of that I’ve been rereading some old Bible study notes from twenty years ago. It’s been an eye-opener to remember the issues which concerned me then, some of them continuously for years, and some flaring briefly and then disappearing. In all of them, I can see the hand of God as he worked things out.

One way to feed the fire within, is to remember what God has done.

Set Aside

Set aside.

I feel better; I feel fine, in fact. But the effects of that pernicious cold linger. There is still too much congestion. Still the stubborn frog in the throat when I awaken. So I hesitate. I hesitate to resume swimming, to resume walking in the icy winds, to mingle with others.

I feel set aside. I am trying to redeem the time. De-cluttering (a bit). Creative writing (a bit). Reading. Lingering longer in the prayer window.

There are worse things than being set aside. That’s for sure.

Responsibilities don’t fade away, though, as I rest. Care for my mother: there are always things to check, things to think through, things to arrange. I’m not really doing them like I normally do. It’s as if I’ve set them aside, too.

Trust in me, Jesus instructs. Don’t be lukewarm in your love or trust. Fully trust. Fully love.

There is a new gap opening in Mom’s care and there could be anxiety developing in me, but I know the gap is right, and I know God can fill it. So as I sit and contemplate, I sense His love, I sense His care, I sense His calling me deeper into Him. He has never let me down and He’s not going to start now.

A new chapter. A new horizon. Expectation and anticipation rise as I recognise much of it is out of my control: over to you, God. I can’t wait to see what you’re going to do.

Set aside, so God can be set free to fully operate.

Change is Coming

A white chiffon curtain suspended from heaven early this morning, shrinking our horizon and shrouding the hills. Gradually the weak winter heat of the sun has dissolved it and as it disappeared, white-topped hills appeared, etched against a blue sky. And now, nearly noon, and a stillness, welcome after so many days of wild winds, embraces us. Birds trill their songs; the icy snow from yesterday melts from the tops of the bushes, and the slush on the drive evaporates.

Everything changes. Some changes I see coming; some will surprise me. Some will delight me; others I will resist.

Jesus, though, is the same, yesterday, today and forever. He is the Rock on whom I stand. He is the anchor in the storm. He is the root to which I am grafted in. Though changes come, he will never change. He will be there for me today, tomorrow, and forever.

So grateful for that security. So grateful for his peace.

Rights and Responsibilities

It’s blowing a hooley out there, as they might say here in the northeast. It has been for days.

So I spent the morning exercising my democratic right – voting in the US Presidential Primary – and fulfilling my democratic responsibility – filling in the dreaded US tax forms.

With rights come responsibilities; with responsibilities come rights. That sounds good: just and balanced. Even if it isn’t lived out in practice.

The original writers of the Declaration of Independence declared that  "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness." Notice that it was men who were accorded equality, and that by many men who denied their slaves liberty. Those slaves, and women and indigenous people and other minorities, had many responsibilities but no rights.

Jesus came to a warped world to trailblaze the way. He came to declare that the creator of the world and everything in it calls us to ‘act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with our God’. His follower Paul wrote that in God’s kingdom there is no Jew, nor slave, nor male or female. All are equal; all are born with truly unalienable rights, and among them is forgiveness of sins and everlasting life in Jesus Christ.

I pray that my vote may help to bring us a step closer to a just society. I have exercised my responsibility; now I trust God to make something beautiful out of the many votes which will be cast. 

And I know that whatever the outcome of the election, through it all, Jesus walks with us.

Griefs

Life is a tapestry of hidden grief.

Grief over lost loved ones.

Grief over no one to love.

Grief over missed opportunities.

Grief over no opportunity.

Grief over poor choices made.

Grief over no choices to make.

Grief over silence when words were needed.

Grief over words when silence would do. 

Thank God, who can weave it all into the deeply beautiful person he created you to be.

Fruitful

A sturdy, two-pronged twig – not sturdy enough obviously - hangs suspended in mid-plunge, a smaller twig supporting it in the intersection of the two prongs.

Despite stormy weather, tender points of incipient buds mark the bare cherry branches. Warming rays tease and tempt the tree towards springtime splendour and summer fruit.

The broken twig, though, hangs smooth and sleek. No sap will rise to feed its points where flower and fruit might have one day swelled, had the storm not broken it away from the trunk.

And still the wind whines and whips, as Storm Dennis stalls above. The disconnected twig swings and sways, supported by the living twig on which it rests. Amputated as it is from the trunk, though, the twig will never bear fruit.

‘No branch will bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me,’ Jesus said.

A word to us all. Jesus advised that by their fruits, we would know who people really are. In an age of easy, lying words, look at the fruit.

Bullet Train

When it’s completed, the controversial high-speed train from London to Birmingham will zip up the country and deposit travellers, in record time, into a brand-new train station. Great, if you’re planning to remain in Birmingham. If, however, your journey continues from Birmingham, you’ll have to pick up your bags and find your way to the old station to connect with the run-of-the-mill train services.

Spiritual journeys can start on a high-speed ‘train’. Responding to an anointed evangelist, who has facilitated a personal encounter between you and God, can be like a high-speed train ride, taking you right out of where you were and into a whole new territory, instantly. Making connections for the onward journeys, however, are not that straight-forward. It’s one thing to be carried along on a bullet train to God, and quite another to find the way to continue that journey through all the trials and ups and downs of daily life. You need to find a faith community where you feel called to fit in. At the very least, you need a prayer partner to keep you chugging along, especially through challenging terrain in your life.

God has richly blessed me and I am full of thankfulness and praise. I inadvertently found myself on that bullet train to God over forty years ago. I was nurtured by believers from all churches, prayed with and prayed for, taught and inspired. Marguerite was a special one to me in those early days. Prayer was her ‘thing’ and she helped me find the joy in spending time with God. She helped me keep moving forward until I found the next station and could continue my journey with others. I couldn’t begin to name all those others who have been special to me in this place, where I have lived for over forty years, for fear I might leave someone out. There have been many.

As Psalm 16 says, the boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places. I don’t take this for granted. I am profoundly grateful.

Promise-Keeper

‘She passed her exam! Let’s celebrate! Make a special meal.’

We celebrate success. We celebrate milestones. We celebrate when someone gets through a challenging time and comes out the other side. That’s when we pop the corks and gather together to party.

But God? He prepares a table for me in the presence of my enemies. Right in the middle of the storm, he invites me to sit down with him and have a banquet. He doesn’t wait until I get out of the tough times I’m in. He doesn’t wait to see if I will come out successfully. He sits down at the banquet table across from me and meets my eye, and in his eyes is a love beyond anything I could ever dream of. In his gaze, I see him, and my faith grows. I know I can trust him, and that I will come out of this tribulation. We can pop the cork and party because we know that he is a promise-keeper.

Praise him.

Left out

‘Gramma, have you ever felt left out?’

I was surprised by the question, and answered truthfully. Yes. Especially when I first married Don and moved to Scotland, where he had family and friends and I knew nobody except him.

Why? I asked. Have you?

Oh, what heartache to hear the growing pains of a beloved 5-year-old granddaughter! Playground friendships swirl one way and then the next, but often leave some standing alone feeling left out: the world can be a cold, lonely place.

It’s a hard lesson, but good for developing character, right? Isn’t that what James writes? When we feel left out and alone, we can grow in our love for and dependence on God, who never leaves us out. We can develop kindness, having felt unkindly treated.

But for a five-year-old, so hard. I wish I could find her a faithful friend. I wish I could tell her what to do that would make it better, but there is no formula for relationships.

What I can do is pray that God will be glorified in this, and she will know the comfort of his presence. I can show her how loved and special she is. 

And I can make sure I don’t leave anyone out in my own activities and relationships.

No Shade

An old-fashioned sundial rests in our vegetable patch, shaded by an acer tree. Not best-placed to catch the full sun, when it’s out. We have plans to redesign the garden, so hopefully we will find a more exposed position for it to sit.

I don’t always place myself in the best position to bathe in the fullness of the Son. Carelessness; laziness; contrariness perhaps. Today I want to take more care to be in a place where I can receive him fully.

Jesus advised us to be alert to the times. I don’t want to be found sleeping, or distracted. I want to be fully engaged, aware of the fronts he is calling me to fight, aware of the folk he is calling me to stand with, aware of the places he wants me to bring his peace.

May nothing shade me this day.

The Face of God

Green wands with a yellow end, rubber-banded together: each child clutched a bunch and offered them, excitedly, to us. One bunch for Don; one bunch for me. There was nothing remarkable about them.

‘For you, Gramma!’ came the joyful shout. ‘For you, Groucho!’

Flick helped me choose the right vase and we put these green sticks into the water. As the day passed, the daffodils responded to the warmth of the room, opening into the promise of spring.

As I sit here this morning, this spray of glorious yellow trumpets brings a smile to my face. I love this time of year. We stand on the threshold of spring, and everywhere there are signs. Birds sing a new tune. Bulbs spike the ground as they stretch towards the warming sun.

Never mind that the wind carries an icy edge to it today. The promise still stands.

Great is God’s faithfulness. Day follows night. Spring follows winter. Good times follow challenging times. And through it all, God is with us. He is there in the spring and there in the winter.

As I look at these cheerful daffodils this morning, I see the beautiful faces of precious grandchildren, excited to give us gifts. In those dear faces, I see the face of God.